Thursday, November 7, 2013

If You Could Change One Thing....

While I'm not accepting the challenge to blog daily for NaBloPoMo, I am trying to blog more often for the month of November, and I was intrigued by their post prompt yesterday. If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?

The answer came easily to me. If I could change one thing about my personality, I would love to have the gift of making conversation. 


I am doubly challenged by this seemingly-perplexing concept. On one hand, getting to know new people is next to impossible for me. If I didn't have a friend to go with, I would be way more likely to stay home from an event than go and make conversation with people I don't know. It's not that I don't like making friends, it's that I literally CANNOT think of what to say to people before I know them well. I am horrible at making small talk. I can't think of a good way to open the conversation, I can't keep a conversation going, I live in fear of awkward pauses. Meeting new people is terrifying to me.

Then... it gets worse. I meet people. I get comfortable. And then I can't shut up! I tend to dominate conversations, talking loudly, telling stories, and just generally getting all wound up. I thrive on the energy and laughter of the group, and get more and more animated, and more and more talkative. When I come down from my "high," usually after I've left, I kick myself for how obnoxious I've been and how much I talked about myself. Really, the art of making conversation is not one that I've mastered.

*sigh*

I have two aunts who are beautiful and gracious conversationalists. When they meet new people, they ask all the right questions to get to know them, and to make the person feel comfortable. They always manage to strike that balance between asking and sharing, and make each person they talk to feel special and valued. It's such an amazing gift, in my opinion, and one I would love to someday cultivate.

But for now, luckily, somehow I manage to make friends, and somehow, once I have them, I manage to keep them. Despite the fact that they've heard the story three dozen times already about when I broke that one girl's nose at Color Guard practice. Heh. 

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1 comment:

ibshell said...

LOVE IT!!! I found you on the thinking closet. I'm in the process of finding out about tribes and wanting to start one. Let me know if you're interested. Love your blog!!